Good news for all guys out there! Researchers at the University of Surrey in England, found scientific evidence this week, to explain why men are genetically programmed to fall asleep after making love to their female partners. (And all this time you ladies probably thought we were all doing it on purpose just to escape from all of that annoying cuddling and 'discussing our feelings' crap!).
Scientists explain why men fall asleep after sex - Weird news & funny pictures
Photo 1: You see ladies, you can't blame us men for doing what comes naturally to all males no matter what the species!
Photo 2: Ladies, the perfect male is out there. And you can make great money if you sell the photos to the right porn site!
Dr. Neil Stanley, director of sleep at the University of Surrey spoke with reporters on Tuesday. "As frustrating as it is for most women that their male partners just roll over and fall asleep after sex, men aren't entirely to blame", he explained.
"The blood rush after climax depletes the muscles of energy-producing glycogen, leaving men feeling physically drained", he continued. "Because they have more muscle mass than women, men become tired after sex and this subsequently leads to them feeling sleepy."
(Dr. Stanley declined to speculate as to which partner in a gay relationship would fall asleep first but the guys here at the Gag Report would put money on it being the 'giver' rather than the 'taker'!)
Interestingly enough, the group's findings were delayed last year after one of the researchers, who had just proved that men are also genetically programmed to sleep around, was found beaten to death in his apartment shortly after trying to explain his scientific theory to his girlfriend.
The guys here at the Gag Report think that Dr. Stanley's theory is only partially correct. So we worked all weekend and finally came up with our own simpler, (and more accurate) version that we would like to share with you all. So here goes...
The main difference between men and women's post-copulation sleep patterns is dependent solely on reaching an orgasm. If you have an orgasm during sex - you will fall asleep soon after. If you don't, you won't. Simple as that!
Yes ladies. Faking it just doesn't require the sort of exertion that a good old fashioned, toe-curling orgasm does. So come on girls. If you want a good night's sleep after a great session then you need to start taking control in the bedroom. You need to really start putting your back into it, (like us fellas do), rather than just lying there like a tub of lard, deciding what color you would like to paint the ceiling!
And guys, you've got to give the old lady a helping hand, (or preferably a helping tongue), rather than just climbing on top, sticking it in for three minutes and then rolling over and farting. After all, just think about the additional benefits.
Once you have a fully sexually-satisfied partner, the nagging level drops off dramatically and if you are lucky, she might even iron the odd shirt for you once in a while, particularly if you offer to cook her breakfast. And remember girls, when he asks you how you would like you eggs in the morning, the correct answer is "unfertilized!"
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